


Toy Ship

by SuperImposed



Series: Kinkfills: Fluff and Misc. Edition [4]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Arranged Marriage, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-06
Updated: 2012-07-06
Packaged: 2017-11-09 06:54:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/452573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperImposed/pseuds/SuperImposed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In an alternate universe, the Beta kids and trolls are brought together in hopes of creating peace. Initially supposed to be a series, but ultimately became a one-shot. Made for the kink meme, and apologies to those who have waited so long for the completion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the kink meme. Prompt is here: http://homesmut.livejournal.com/7440.html?thread=10188048#t10188048

Your name is John Egbert and you are meeting trolls for the first time!

Your Dad has been warning you and training you for this since you were about three years old. You’re only five now, but you feel like a big boy now.

Your friends are here too! Dave is in the corner with a very shy troll boy. His horns are huge! The troll’s, not Dave’s. Dave doesn’t have horns.

Rose got into a fight with the scarfed boy who talked weirdly. The adults - especially the adult trolls - were upset, but the troll adults were kind of weird about it. She’s getting along a lot better with the pretty troll girl now.

Jade hit it off immediately with another pretty troll girl, one who wears bright skirts and goggles. They’re playing pat-a-cake and giggling right now. The adults got weird over that, but eventually settled down.

The kind of sweaty boy you were talking to leaves, going over to Rose and the other girl. The last troll boy peels himself off the wall and heads your way.

The adults tense up again, but then he smiles, and you smile, and you forget to check with your dad that everything’s okay.

He’s pretty neat, anyways! He says his name is Gamzee and he’s almost three sweeps old. He’s got messy hair - but not as messy as his dad, who keeps giving you weird looks - and long, thin horns that make you think of a goat. 

Gamzee is a lot like a goat, actually; he has a weird, but not bad, smell, and he talks weirdly, going from soft to loud and back again, and he looks like he should stumble over his baggy pants any second but every step is perfectly graceful.

He says a lot of words that you only hear at Dave’s house, and you giggle as his dad scowls; you tell him about your pranks, remembering just in time not to tell him about the bucket one, and he laughs at each one like it’s the best thing you’ve ever heard. By the time your parents collect you and lead you back to Rose’s mom’s limo, your whole face hurts from smiling.

Maybe you’ll get to see him again!  
\--------

When you turn seven, you see Gamzee again. This time it’s just the two of you and your dads in the room, although you saw your friends go off with some of the kids from last time.

He tells you he’s four sweeps old, and by now you’ve been given the lesson on troll ages so you don’t feel confused.

He’s still skinny and WAY tall. The white paint he was wearing when you first met now has a dark gray circle around his mouth. You say it makes him look like a clown. He tells you about subjugglators. They sound scary! You tell him as much, and something on his face changes. His smile doesn’t seem quite the same.

You keep talking, and eventually he seems almost like his old self. Finally your dads wave to you, and it’s time to go. You give him a quick hug, smile at him, and scamper off.

You wonder why he looked so surprised?  
\---------------------

It’s a long time until you see Gamzee again - nearly four years! You’re ten, he’s almost six - from what you get of troll years, that means he’d be about eleven on Earth.

Your dad has been giving you some weird reading material - human anatomy, troll anatomy, and pamphlets on being gay. You thought the last one (c’mooooon dad, you’re _ten_ , you barely have an concept of sex to begin with!) had something to do with dad being worried about how much you stay over at Dave’s place or something, but he tells you it’s the opposite. Oh well. If he wants you to see Dave more....

The next time you visit Gamzee, you bring cookies. He stares at them like he’s never seen anything like them, while your dads whisper in the background. Eventually you get him to try one. His eyes get big and he talks even more about miracles.

His face is painted up like a clown’s today. You don’t really like your dad’s harlequins, but it looks really cool on him! You tell him so, and he smiles so big you think his head is going to split.

His horns have grown bigger, too, and without thinking, without remembering all the lessons your dad gave you on troll etiquette, you reach up to touch them.

His dad makes a sharp growling sound in the back of his throat and you snap your hand back. Your dad is glaring at Gamzee’s now, and- oh gog, did you cause a fight?! You try to stop it before it begins, namely by immediately blurting out an apology to your friend.

Gamzee pats you on the back and tells you it’s cool. Both of your parents simmer down a bit. For the rest of the visit, you’re on your best behavior.

You head to the door as the visit draws to a close. Gamzee’s dad is talking to one of the people who runs the facility; your dad is getting the car. The two of you say your goodbyes in the doorway, Gamzee leaning on it like he forgot how to stay upright on his own.

As he licks the last cookie crumbs from his fingers and you turn to go, he stops you. He checks his dad, then yours - you mimic him confusedly - then grabs your hand. For a split second, he pauses, then lifts up tentatively and brushes your fingers against his horn.

On the car drive back, you ask your dad when you can see Gamzee again. He gives you an odd look and says he’ll try to make it sooner. You’re pretty okay with that answer.

You rub your fingers all the way home.

\----------------------------------------------

The gap between visits shrinks quite a bit. The last one was four years; this time it’s four weeks.

Gamzee looks really happy to see you! You don’t get to visit for as long, but you keep seeing each other every few weeks from this point on. You start bringing more food - his dad wasn’t too happy about the pies, but you’re told as long as you don’t bring anything green it’s okay.

Gamzee’s changing. 

He drifts off more and more, reminding you of Jade a little bit, and when he comes back something feels a little bit off.

He’s getting better at applying the makeup - the shaky lines soon all but disappear, the cracks happening less often when he emotes. His dad seems a little more proud of him, too, as if he’s developing into something....something amazing.

Amazing doesn’t always mean good.

One day, your dad brings you a book about Subjugglators. It’s been translated from troll, Rose’s Mom’s neat handwriting in the margins, but you learned the Alternian alphabet years ago and so have multiple frames of reference.

The book chills you to the core, not censored in the way an Earth tome would be. It describes the atrocities -’services’ - that subjugglators commit, or ‘provide’. They care for none but themselves and the Empress, and anyone not dear to them could become fodder for their clubs.

The thought of Gamzee becoming - becoming _that_ , it makes you sick in a way you can’t describe. Your visits get a little odder, as you realize the undertone that ran through them was the gradual loss of your friend.

You give him more hugs and react even more favorably when he acts like his goofy self. Part of you didn’t expect it to work - but it did.


	2. Chapter 2

You notice even more subtleties, as Gamzee’s old self comes back. His voice starts fluctuating again. His smiles are less teeth and more full face. A rough edge to his voice that you never noticed drops away.

You get the feeling that he’s - he’s trying, for you. You do your best to quietly support his efforts, and soon he stops improving but also doesn’t revert. He’s stable, for now. Your friend again.

Until the next visit.

Your dad pulled some strings and you and Gamzee are meeting out of doors, in a park near the facility. Dave and Rose and the others are there too, making it less awkward and more casual.

You’re eleven, now, and Gamzee’s close to twelve. You set up a picnic in the afternoon, in a pleasant area under the trees. Your troll friend is fascinated by the autumn leaves, the colors reflected in his darkening eyes.

The trolls are still uneasy in the (relatively) weak sunlight of your planet, but Gamzee’s mellow again, or as close as it seems he will ever be, and takes no notice.

You’ve never seen him in natural light and it somehow....makes him _beautiful_. His gray skin looks alive, purple-tinted eyes warm under hooded lids, faint indigo highlights standing out in his hair. His horns practically glow.

The visit goes off without a hitch, adult trolls and humans making pleasant conversation while keeping an eye on you and the others. Dave’s brother perches in a tree nearby, watching the proceedings.

As the sun sets and the moon rises, the adults speak a little more in depth. Gamzee’s watching them, for some reason; when the gold beacons of the trolls’ eyes turn away, he quickly grabs your hand and tows you into the trees.

You stop, not too far from the group, darkness nearly black under the trees. All you can see are your friend’s warm eyes and cold teeth, facepaint the barest blur in the night.

\--------

He presses your hand to his chest, smiling shyly at you. “jOhN.”

“yeah, gamzee?”

He stops, and it occurs to you that he is _afraid_. It’s so out of character that you’re momentarily lost for words.

“you.....you LI- like me, RiGhT?”

“of course.”

He pauses again.

“i mEaN....fuck, HU- hUmAnS DoN’T have PiTy, nOt lIkE....”

You curl your fingers in his shirt “i know, though. really!” you add, to his incredulous look, “dad made sure i knew a lot about troll culture. i think....” you hesitate. “um....that maybe.....there’s a specific reason they had us meet? I mean me and my friends and you and your friends or enemies or-” 

He presses a finger to your lips. His heart is pounding behind his skinny ribs. “tHeN.....um....” He scratches the back of his neck, shifts from one foot to the other. “motherfuck, i CAN’T- just don’t....don’t hate me, okay?”

He grabs your shoulders, loosely.

And then Gamzee Makara kissed you.

\-----------

Your hands shove him away before you can even _think_. You almost raise an arm to scrub at your mouth before your brain finally engages.

Oh god, he looks so _hurt_. “gamzee, i-”

“no, no,” he waves a hand, “it’s COOL BRO, I UNDERSTAND-”

“no really i-”

“i motherfucking GET IT-”

You spend several confused moments babbling at each other, both trying to set the other straight. Then Dave’s Bro appears, grabbing each of you by the shoulder. You both turn to look at him in confusion; he merely nods and tows you back to the group.

You and Gamzee sit on opposite sides of the blanket, awkwardly not meeting each other’s gazes, both jumping when you catch the other’s eye during a stolen glimpse. The adults are aware that something’s wrong, but there’s no way you can discuss it here; when you break to go home, Gamzee barely nods at you; you wave sadly.

Your dad seems concerned, casting glances back over his shoulder on the drive home, but you just shake your head and draw your feet up onto the seat, burying your head in your knees.

Your name is John Egbert, and you have just royally screwed up.


	3. Chapter 3

Your name is John Egbert, and you miss your friend.

\------------------

Your name is John Egbert, and you are going to fix this mess if it means getting stabbed in the ribs multiple times.

\---------------

Your name is John and you are currently listing everything you can think of about your once good friend, Gamzee Makara.

The is what you have so far.

-reeeeallly tall!  
-like a year older than me?  
-likes pies but can’t have them?  
-really likes the cookies and stuff ~~you~~ i bring him (why did i write ‘you’?)  
-wants to be a subjugglator  
-looks really ~~cu~~ good in clown paint and is good at putting it on  
-kind of like a goat  
- ~~something wrong with his head~~ ~~messed up in the~~ special*  
-dad is scary and gets angry easy but likes him?  
-a troll

Wow, this is a shitty list.

\---------------

You try to get your dad to set up a meeting between you and Gamzee again, but after a long phone call, he just looks at you and shakes his head. He looks so downcast at being unable to help you that you fake cheer and abscond to your room.

A week later, you make what is probably the dumbest, smartest, most dangerous decision of your life.

You ask Dave for help.

\-------------------

GT: dave.  
GT: dave, are you there?  
TG: sup bro  
GT: oh thank flthulu.  
TG: no thanks man  
TG: im allergic to calimari  
TG: even made a rap about it  
GT: haha, wow, i would love to hear it but not right now.  
GT: i need your help.  
TG: you came to the right place then

An hour later you are hunched down in the passenger seat of his brother’s ironically shitty pink pick-up truck, fingers white from gripping the seat. 

You are really thankful that the facility is out in the sticks, so halfway through the drive you don’t have to worry about pedestrians, stop lights, stop signs, yield signs, dips, trash cans, dogs, other cars, or storefronts that are placed too close to the street - that is, within six feet of the curb.

On the downside, this means he drives faster.

\-----------------

When Bro, as he demands you call him, finally stops, skidding and sending a beautiful arc of gravel across the parking lot, the sky is already getting dark. You guiltily run your fingers over the cell phone in your pocket, turned off and no doubt receiving numerous worried texts from your father.

After nearly falling due to your legs being totally numb, you thank Mr. Strider for the ride. He nods and makes sure you have his number for the return trip. Just before he leaves, he tips his hat to you and wishes you the best of luck.

You are going to need it.


	4. Chapter 4

The knocks resound dully even after vigorous attacks with your fist, and you’re beginning to think this was a bad idea when the door finally opens to reveal a female troll - Kanaya’s mom. She smiles slightly and ushers you inside, which gives you a much-needed confidence boost. You follow her, stuffing bruised knuckles into your pocket.

She leads you to a door smeared with greasepaint and some gummy green substance - Gamzee’s room. Before you can have second thoughts, she’s knocking on it and then absconding down the hall, pausing only to give you a thumbs-up.

The door opens.

\-----------------

The same moment you see Gamzee’s eyes is when he sees you - the gold orbs widen, and the door slams shut.

Welp.

\-----------------

“gamzee!”

You pound on the door, trying to do that loud-quiet thing people do when they want to get one person’s attention, but nobody else’s.

You really should have come up with a plan. Of course, none of the ones you could have made would have involved him slamming the door immediately, so either way you’re at square one.

You hit the door again, trying to bring as much Egbertian MANGRIT(TM) as you have to bear. 

Five minutes later, after your hand stops throbbing (mostly), you finally straighten up, nearly smacking your forehead on the ajar portal. Tentatively, you push it open enough to admit your into the forbidding gloom.

Here goes nothing.


	5. Chapter 5

You’ve barely taken a step before the door closes behind you, sealing you in the dark. With your last ounce of will, you keep from panicking and whipping around, going still to take stock of the situation instead.

“gamzee.....?”

The room is utter black, no hint of light even from under the door. Your and his breaths rebound off the walls, creating the disorienting illusion that you stand at the bottom of the sea. 

You lick your lips and open your mouth to try again, but don’t get the chance. The tension breaks at the touch of his hand on your shoulder.

“john.”

Warm, moist breath ghosts across the back of your neck. You can picture, bright as day, your goaty friend standing there; you have no doubt that he has full command of the room, while you are still adrift at sea.

Courage.

“gamzee,” you say clearly, “i wanted to say that i’m sorry.”

A raspy chuckle emanates from your back. “IS THAT SO.”

“y-” you swallow, mouth suddenly dry. “yeah, it is. i acted - i was horrible. i shouldn’t have reacted like that. i shouldn’t have hurt you.”

“is that so? LITTLE FRIEND.” His touch vanishes, leaving you alone again in the pitch black. You think he might be circling you? Yeah, you could see him doing that. “is that because WE’RE FRIENDS? YOU FEEL BAD for hurting your buddy’s DELICATE FEELINGS?”

“well, yeah!” you say, before you can even think. “we’re friends, or at least we were, and i feel really bad for hurting you.....god this is a shitty apology. i am sorry, gamzee! i messed up.”

“and that’s it?” his voice goes suddenly flat, and you feel thrown off. You get the feeling something went really, really wrong, but you have no idea _what_. 

“well, i, yeah! i came to apologize, and i, well, sort of apologized. gog i am such a shitty friend. i am sorry i hurt your feelings, gamzee. i don’t know a better way to say that!”

The room goes too still, too silent for a moment. When he speaks, it’s flatter than you’ve ever heard his voice before.

“apology MOTHERFUCKING ACCEPTED. get the fuck out of here AND DON’T EVER COME BACK.”

Yeah, you definitely fucked up somewhere along the line here. “gamzee-?”

Hands suddenly shove against you, the door is flung open just in time, and out you go.

“hey!” Your indignant cry is followed by the most important question. Why are you so stupid? You should have asked this first thing. “are we still friends!?”

He pauses in the middle of slamming the heavy door shut, hunted eyes starting at the floor for long moments before looking to you. “yeah,” he says, sounding suddenly weary, “friends. FRIENDS, LIKE WE ALWAYS MOTHERFUCKING BEEN, AND ALWAYS WILL MOTHERFUCKING BE.”

When the door closes in your face, you feel like you managed to somehow fuck up even worse.


	6. Chapter 6

You sit numbly through dinner, barely taking a bite. Your father’s punishment (no dessert) is more blessing than anything else - after one final scolding, you rush upstairs and throw yourself on the bed.

You need to talk to somebody who isn't going to lecture you. Mock, maybe, but not lecture.

TG: so howd it go  
GT: i am so fucked.  
TG: ouch  
TG: what happened  
TG: did you tell him his eyes were like an ocean  
TG: the ladies love that  
GT: what, no.  
GT: dude, i asked if we were still friends.  
TG: and?  
GT: he said yes.  
TG: ouch  
GT: do you know what i did wrong? because i sure as hell don’t. i just know that i did.  
GT: something wrong, i mean.  
TG: aw dude  
TG: you dont even get how badly you screwed this pooch  
TG: made out with this terrier  
TG: filled buckets with jades white hellhound  
GT: helpful!  
GT: i think i will ask rose’s advice.  
TG: okay stow that  
TG: i am the mad romance expert here  
GT: i do not know about that!  
GT: so far you have done nothing but laugh at my misfortune and give me useless advice.  
GT: oh and also made metaphors to cover your unironic love of canine bestiality.  
TG: dude ew  
TG: i think youve talked to rose too much already  
TG: unless youre the one not coming clean about wanting to break the law for the sake of hot sweaty barnyard banging  
GT: yes dave!  
GT: i totally want to fuck goats and also your mom!  
GT: can we stay on track here?  
GT: i think i screwed up our friendship even worse than the first time around.  
TG: well no shit dude  
TG: he has the hots for your pasty unmuscled nerd-ass  
TG: god only knows why  
TG: and when he starts macking on you you shove him away like his mouth was an olive branch and the realm of egbertia makeoutia wants war for another sixty years  
TG: and then you ask him if he still wants to be friends? jesus  
GT: :B  
GT: thanks dave!  
GT: i suddenly understand the situation perfectly!  
GT: except for all the parts where i don’t.  
TG: shut up and sit down  
TG: im on a roll here  
GT: i swear to god if you start rapping i’ll tell rose about your hidden desire to bone jade’s dog-dad.  
TG: youre a cold hearted bitch john egbert  
TG: so  
TG: anyways  
TG: heres how it all goes together  
TG: dude wants to make out but you dont  
TG: thats fine trolls have like fifty ‘lets never touch fun bits ever’ quadrants  
GT: really?  
GT: i thought they only had two  
GT: out of four.  
GT: you know, since they’re quadrants.  
TG: shut up  
TG: okay  
TG: gamzee  
TG: wants  
TG: to  
TG: fuck  
TG: you  
TG: but if he cant hell probably settle at least temporarily for being best pale broskis  
TG: shooshpapping all the day long  
TG: or night  
TG: whatever  
TG: but being moirails and being friends is like totally different  
TG: so youre basically telling him you dont want to be in any foursquare thing with him at all  
GT: but i don’t!  
TG: obligatory kneejerk reaction aside you totally do  
TG: or at least youre totally supposed to  
TG: unless you have another troll you want to get your mack on with but i think were supposed to fill quadrants with as many lonely hearts as we can so whatever  
TG: and lets be honest egbert  
TG: you do  
GT: i do what?  
TG: you  
TG: want  
TG: to  
TG: jump  
TG: that skinnyass clown trolls  
TG: bones  
GT: dave!  
TG: tell me im wrong  
GT: you’re wrong.  
TG: now uncross your fingers or whatever juvenile thing you did and tell me straight  
TG: haha straight  
TG: but seriously  
TG: be honest with me bro  
GT:  
GT: yeah, you’re right.  
TG: knew it  
GT: i am totally alien-troll-gay for gamzee!  
GT: we are going to get married on a sunset beach and then fly into the rainbow trailing the dozens of human-troll babies we suddenly had!  
GT: i will wear a very nice white dress and you can be my maid of honor.  
GT: (that was such a great movie)  
TG: do i get to plan the bachelorette party  
GT: duh, dave! what did you think being the maid of honor meant?  
GT: make sure there are plenty of jello shots and kind of pathetic male strippers.  
TG: sure thing  
TG: oops i accidentally booked the strip joint next to the one where the bachelor party is going on  
GT: dave no!  
GT: that is like the biggest bachelor/ette party faux pas you can make!  
TG: sorry bro  
GT: now my wedding will be ruined!  
TG: no worries we can get your deposit back  
TG: and also since bridesmaid dresses are so nice i can just wear it to parties and such  
TG: so in the end we kind of made out ahead  
TG: *came out ahead  
GT: ahahahahahaha!  
GT: rose will have a field day with that.  
TG: fuck you egbert  
GT: yeah i know you want to.  
TG: hell no i can score much better than your sorry ass  
GT: that’s the second time you’ve mentioned my ass today, dave!  
TG: shut up shut up shu  
GT: dave?  
TG: John.  
GT: ???  
TG: Bro here.  
GT: oh.  
GT: hello mister strider!  
TG: First, call me Bro. Second, you obviously feel something for Gamzee, and you need to act on it before he fully convinces himself that you want to have nothing to do with him.  
GT: oh! yeah, good point.  
GT: it’d be kind of bad if i finally got up the courage to confess only to find out that he got over me.  
GT: that kind of plot should only appear in terrible romcoms.  
TG: Whatever.   
TG: You should tell him, soon.  
GT: ….are you offering me another ride?  
TG: Unfortunately I will be busy for most of the week.  
TG: However I believe Ms. Lalonde may be able to transport you.  
TG: Or even your father, if you properly explained the stakes.  
GT: i guess so....  
GT: oh god, but if it goes well he’ll bake one of *those* cakes.  
TG: ?  
GT: you don’t want to know.  
TG: Just tell me it isn’t worth sabotaging yourself over.  
TG: I do not want to have wasted my time over all of this only for you to get cold feet.  
GT: oh! right, sorry.   
GT: i guess i’ll ask dad....  
GT: i mean if this is really for intergalactic peace or whatever then he should help.  
GT: thank you for the advice mister strider!  
TG: fuck bro  
GT: hey dave.  
TG: i cant believe it took you this long to figure out you wanted him  
GT: like you want me?  
TG: fuck you egbert

\----------------

\----- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -----

TT: Dogs, hm?  
TG: godfuckingdammit john

\--------------------

Your dad is not happy with the idea, but even he admits that you don’t really have much choice here.

The week before the meet is a rough one for you. Asking to see Gamzee again is one thing - deciding what to do is another. Obviously you want to confess to him, but until your conversation with Dave you didn’t even know what you _wanted_ to confess. You guess you thought you could just go along with being happy friends with everybody for the rest of your life or something.

Jegus. You’re twelve, and if you understand how trolls feel about this kind of thing, you basically _are_ going to get married to Gamzee. Even though the trolls with human partners get some sort of exemption from bucket filling, in the interest of intergalactic peace....

Yeah.

If you really go through with this, you will be with Gamzee for the rest of your life.

….provided he still wants you and doesn’t decide to beat you into a fine mist with his clubs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am fairly bad at Dave, so I'm sorry if it seems off. Also, I have been made aware that Dave does, in fact, use capitals and punctuation when it suits him so no, that's not a mistake.


	7. Chapter 7

Your name is John Egbert and you have not been this nervous in all of your twelve-and-change-year-old _life_.

You wait in a different meeting room than usual - more like a parlor, really. You go from sitting on a nice couch to pacing around the room, then start looking at the stock pictures on the walls before the door finally opens.

To your relief, Gamzee doesn’t look angry, at least no more than usual these days (....that’s actually pretty depressing). In fact, a faint blush is visible under his neat paint, and it only deepens when he locks eyes with you.

You’re both silent for a moment before you finally call up enough courage to speak. “hi gamzee,” you mutter sheepishly, then mentally facepalm. Real smooth Egbert!

He’s of apparently the same mind, giving you disdainful glance. The effect is rather spoiled by the still-present blush.

You try again. “i’m back. uh. but i guess you noticed that. i mean, argh, how do i say this....?”

His expression is narrowing into something like a glare and you finally just throw all caution to the wind, stride up, and lay one on him.

\--------------

You can feel him freeze under you, and geez you’re tall for your age but when did Gamzee get this huge? You pull back, look him breathlessly in the eyes, and manage to squeak out “i like you _too_ , you idiot.”

His dumbfounded expression stays for a moment longer before a silly grin starts creeping up his face. Giddy with relief, you kiss him again, and this time he joins in. 

\-------------

Later you learn that he was blushing because apparently his dad brought him to the meeting room, told him you were inside, and let him know that there were buckets under the couch if he needed them. Trolls are kind of creepy.

You mean, you kind of wanted to need them, but the most you got up to were some _very_ sloppy makeouts, which is probably for the best. You really do not want your dad to bake a “Congrats on the sex” cake.

\-------------

Gamzee probably had too much of the parental embarrassment confection, but like hell you were going to stop him. He’s kind of grotesquely adorable when stuffing his face. Also there is no way you were going to try to get between his razor-ridden Sarlacc maw and sugar. You like having hands, especially when they can get such _fun_ reactions out of your boyfriend. Matesprit? Husbandsprit? Whatever.

The last five years flew by, by which you mean “crawled at an utterly unbearable pace”. But hey, you made it! Pail day....night.....anyways, you are now a kind of sort of officially recognized couple! The quadrant system is still a little hard to get used to, and you’re still a little miffed about sharing your flushfriend with someone else, but it’s working. Hopefully this will help with peace stuff, but at this point you really don’t care.

You snuggle next to your sugar-and-sex-zonked boysprit, close your eyes, and drift off with a smile on your face.

It has been a _very_ good day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited ending! I have always been terrible at concluding my works, and this one has been revised many, many times. I may change it in the future, but at this point I am simply happy to finally complete a fic long in the making. :)  
> If anyone wants to do a same-universe fic with a different pairing, that's is fine by me! In any case, thank you, and good night.


End file.
